Empathetic statements and complements that are crafted properly go a long way to predisposing a prospect to like you. That is because when someone feels good about themselves, they will also like you.
Empathetic Statements
Did you know that by making empathetic statements you can make a prospect feel good about themselves and in turn make them like you more?
Empathy statements are short phrases that help you establish a connection with the person to whom you are talking to. They show that the other person is your focus of attention and that they are the topic of the conversation. In addition, empathetic statements help create trust and mutual understanding.
Empathetic statements such as “So you look like you’re having a bad day” or “So you look happy today” let people know that you care about them. This kind of attention makes people feel good about themselves and more importantly predisposes the prospect to like you since you gave them some attention.
The basic formula for an empathetic statement starts with the words “So you…” For example, “So you look like you are not feeling too good today, are you ok?” or “So you look like you enjoyed the presentation.”
Empathetic statements that start with “so you…” are far better than saying “I know how you feel” which triggers the other person to think “no you don’t know how I feel because you are not me.” The basic “So you…” formula ensures that the focus of the conversation remains on the other person.
Complements
A fine line separates flattery from compliments. The word flattery has negative connotations. Flattery is often associated with insincere compliments use to exploit and manipulate others for selfish reasons. The purpose of compliments is to praise others and acknowledge their accomplishments. As relationships develop, compliments play an increasingly greater role in relationships. Complementing another person tells them that you are interested in them and what they do.
A potential pitfall of using compliments in new business relationships is that you often do not know the prospect well enough to be really sincere in your compliments. Insincere compliments are perceived as flattery and give the prospect a negative impression of you.
No one likes to feel they’re being manipulated by insincere flattery, especially from salespeople. A prospect knows what they are good at and what they are not good at. If you attempt to compliment them about something they know they are not good at, they will question your motives. They recognize the discrepancy between your assessment of them and the way they see themselves and will label you as someone that is insincere and not trustworthy.
When it comes to complements you can look for ways to allow others to complement themselves. You can construct a dialogue that predisposes people to recognize their own accomplishments as a way to give themselves a compliment. For example, you might say “It sure looks like you put a lot of effort into that customer’s proposal”, to which they might reply, “Yes I worked on it all weekend” You might then add that “It takes a lot of dedication and determination to commit your weekend to writing a proposal“.
You can also use a third party to complement a person as a way to prime a person of interest. You can construct a third party complement by finding a friend, colleague, or acquaintance who knows both you and the person of interest. You will want to make sure that the third-party person is chatty-patty and likely to pass along your compliment to the person to whom you are intended in sharing a compliment. After the third-party person shares what you said, the next time you meet the person of interest they will very likely see you in a positive light. Priming at prospect using a third party can be a powerful tool if used properly.
How can you use empathetic statements and complements effectively to get others to like you?
